Saturday, August 23, 2008

Comedic Kindness

I've been going through Mom's things and though I know it's a necessary task, there are days it's a real struggle. The other day I found Mom's calendar and seeing her life planned on the page in her familiar handwriting, the pain hit me something fierce. The kids were upstairs playing and I just laid down on the floor and tried not to cry.

After a bit Birdie boy came down and asked "Mom, are you crying?"

"No." I tried not to sniff.

He immediately came down the stairs and knelt down beside me while I fingered the calendar. "You are crying." Well, I hadn't been before, but his kindness set me off, so I nodded my head. He wrapped an arm around me and put his cheek next to mine and tried to comfort me as best as his nine year-old self could. He patted my back while my tears dampened the carpet and said, "It's okay, Mom. I'm sad too."

Tin-man came to the stairs then. "Is Mom crying?"

Birdie nodded and Tin-man immediately rushed to me and knelt by my head, but instead of trying to comfort me he grabbed the calendar and started to flip through it furiously.

"What are you doing?" Birdie asked.

"Trying to find what made my mom cry!" was his answer. That made me cry even harder.

Birdie stood then and said, "Mom, you don't have to do anything else. I'll clean up for you. Just tell us what to do." He wrapped his arm back around me and, scooting to the side, went to sit down, then promptly yelped and leapt to his feet, rubbing his backside. Startled, I glanced to my left to see what had attacked him to find toothpicks scattered across the carpet, the holder they'd been in tipped on its side. I started to laugh hysterically and both boys joined me rather quickly.

He picked up the toothpicks and smacked them with his hand. "Bad toothpicks. Mom, what do I do with them?"

I answered, "Well, after they've been stuck in your butt I don't think anybody's going to want to use them." I handed him the garbage and, laughing, he tossed them out.

What a joy they are to my aching heart.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Something Light for a Change

You Are Belle!
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Intelligent and kind. Your beauty goes much further than your apperance. Also, you make judgements of people based on their personality and not their looks. Attaining all the knowledge that you can is one of your major goals in life, but you are also a person who can make things happen.

Which Disney Princess Are You?

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Poetic Grief

Thanks to all who have sent condolences and prayers my way, whether through comments, personal e-mail, a card, phone call, or signing the guest book on the newspaper website. It has been so helpful and meaningful to have so many of you reach out to me during such a difficult time.

Yesterday I was out of town and found myself picking up the phone to call Mom and check on her. When it dawned on me nobody was on the other end, my heart just about broke, but rather than have a melt-down I put it on paper. The following poem is what resulted:
Poetic Grief
I picked up the phone
to call you tonight
when I remembered . . .
you're not there.
Yesterday, I went downstairs
to talk to you
but only the silent remnants
of your life greeted me with memories
. . . and you're not there.
Tomorrow I'll want to share
the music of this masterpiece
and you won't be there.
I never knew how big you were
until I tried to fill the void
you left behind.
There's not enough stuff in the world
to fill this hole.
The place you lived in my heart
is empty
. . . because you're not there.

Saturday, August 9, 2008

And Now . . . I Bid You Adieu

Theda Earlene Gillespie 1931 ~ 2008 Our beloved mother, grandmother, and friend passed from this earthly existence on August 6, 2008 surrounded by those she loved.Earlene was born Sept. 6, 1931 in Tucson, Arizona to Earl Christopher Sipe and Elizabeth Elder. She was a woman full of light and life, a woman who seemed to succeed at nearly everything she tried, from grand gardens to building rooms. Earlene was one of the choice spirits who walk upon the earth seeking to do service for those around her. She had great integrity, a huge heart, and a beautiful spirit and will be sorely missed. Earlene is survived by her six children: Collette Johnson (Washington); Doug Clement (Bountiful); Linda Capello (Idaho); Mark Clement (Oregon); Karen Hoover (Tooele); and Sean Gillespie (Salt Lake). This only child produced six children, 21 grandchildren, and 28 great-grandchildren, and she spent her last few hours surrounded by many of them, sharing stories and joyful memories of our years with her. Services will be held at 1 p.m. on Fri., August 8 at the chapel on 2600 S. and 500 W. in Bountiful. All welcome.

It is not easy to say good-bye to those we love, especially when it is a separation that will last until one crosses from this world to the next. On Wednesday, August 6, at 3:05 a.m., my dear, sweet mother unexpectedly crossed the veil into the eternities.

Farewell, Mama. Thank-you for all the years of love, friendship, and unwavering support. You will be sorely missed. Hugs and kisses for eternity.